Tuning Out the Distractions

My new friend Marney is a professional dog trainer (and a good one to boot!). She typically works with dogs when they've had some problem (bit someone or acted really agressively) but sometimes she gets dogs that just need a little bit of fine tuning. Often this involves how the dog she is training interacts with other dogs.

I ran into Marney on our street last week (a divine appointment, I like to say) and got the chance to talk a walk with her and see her in action while training one of her dogs. It was amazing to watch. First, the dog was totally focused on her, and responded to her cues and little rewards. But mostly I was impressed by how focused Marney was on the dog. As she and the dog approached other dogs (and their owners) Marney was right there talking to the dog and maintaining eye contact with it constantly.

Meanwhile, the other owners were talking away - and even trying to give Marney directions (turn your dog around so my puppy can learn not to jump!). It was so chaotic I was having trouble focusing on who was where, and there was Marney - calm in the midst of it and completely focused on her task at hand. She didn't say a word to any of the other owners - even to negate directions thrown her way, or even to respond to hellos.

So often in my life I have trouble shutting off that voice in my head - what will people think? I spend a lot of energy making sure everyone else is okay - not letting them down, wondering how someone will react to what I've done. How refreshing to meet someone who can tune everyone else out and just focus on what's important - now.

Clearly most moments of life require being IN the moment, and being open and aware of other people's needs - that's our call as Christians, to be a point of light and encouragement in the darkness. But I think too often my authentic self gets stifled when I am worrying too much about someone else (that stranger will think I'm rude if I don't say hello!) or (I should wear my wig because they will feel uncomfortable if I show up to this party bald).

I got a call today from an old friend Maureen who I haven't talked to in a year. She also has been suffering from hair loss and has been really struggling with the pain and stigma of losing her hair. I hope that her pain will lessen as mine has over time. She is such a light in the world and I want her to be out in it - without worrying about what people are thinking. Tune out the voice in my head.