Inaction

A few weeks ago, I posted on a friend's blog that this was my goal for the next three months: "I want to remake our home into a calm place of refuge that is both filled with joy and relaxation - a place to sink into at the end of the day and a place to celebrate during the day."

Since then I've hired a babysitter a couple of days a week and have a) started networking to find my next job b) updated my resume and linkedin profile c) made some calls that were overdue and d) generally checked a bunch of things off my list.

I have done absolutely nothing on the home project.

Last week I decided maybe I could bypass the whole issue by aha! moving to a new house. I thought this was brilliant idea of course, and immediately spent too many hours on zillow and other sites searching for our next great place. My husband reminded me that this was not in our plans for the immediate future. So the inaction continues.

I say that I want my hair to grow back. Yet there are also things that I know I need to do, that I have not prioritized.

Like sleep. If there's one thing that's supposed to help the immune system - it's getting those 9+ hours, particularly between 10:00 pm and midnight. And I haven't been faithfully using the rosemary oil and vinegar rinse that my accupuncturist gave me.

I'm not trying to beat myself up. But I do think it is healthy, every once in a while, to examine what I *say* I want to accomplish, and what I am actually doing. It's easy when something looms so big to never take a step at all (home project!). But I know I just need to take the first step. And then take another smaller one. And then to write those goals up on a piece of paper that I can look at every day so I can remember how I am doing.

And so now I'm going to sign off, and go to bed. :)