Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Visibility into What I Don't Want

A few weeks ago, I had an amazing weekend in Seattle - doing some strategic planning with my new boss and then spending a great weekend reconnecting with my friend, also named Megan. On Sunday we went to this "hot" yoga class led by this great young guy. The class was such a good balance between flow and stillness - we moved with good beats in the background, and then took a moment to be still and take it all in. Plus I kind of liked all the sweat and heat!

So I wanted to recreate the magic.

On Monday, I tried to do too much and ended up a bit stressed. And I ended up going on Yelp and found an afternoon hot yoga class not too far from my home.

When I entered the class I got the feeling that it didn't quite resonant with me. But I gamely went on, and I started praying. "God, help me find the goodness in this." I often talk about how going to church can be like a yoga class - just because you go to a class you don't like doesn't mean you should throw out the whole practice.

When the teacher told us all not to drink so loudly from our water bottles (seriously!) I prayed again, God help me find the goodness in this. And when he insisted that our feet stay on the towels, as my feet slid off again and again, I just laughed.

All the while, praying to God for the goodness.

What I came away with was surprising, but real. Notice what you don't like - because that will point you to what you love, and what you need.

I could list the numerous things I didn't like about the class. But I learned much more about what resonates with me. So I'll frame this in the positive:

I feel alive in spaces that have a connection to nature. I need teachers who have a sense of humor, and don't take themselves too seriously.  Sometimes the exercise I need most is to slow down. I need to trust my instincts, and leave when it doesn't feel right.

Needless to say, I won't be going back to that yoga class. But I did learn a lot about what I DO want and need in this journey called life, and in spite of it all, my body felt more flexible.

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